I have shocked the staff at The Camel Toe Report, by sacking our long time serving photographer Lyle, after blagging a couple of tickets to the Beijing 2008 Olympics, then sneaking him in through the trades man entrance, he is caught by NBC trying to catch Nastia moving her hands to get a quick swatch of her bulge but there is a few thing which annoy me here.

Toe Factor: 10
Beers/day: 10
Brilliance of creating “Girls gone Wild”: 10
Brilliance of getting Snoop Dogg to host “GGW”: 10

Spring Break is something that I will never get too old to enjoy watching on MTV. I fully expect to be watching it in diapers in an assisted living facility in 2044. I don’t even think that in college I’d have actually wanted to go to South Padre Island or Daytona Beach, but my vicarious pleasure in witnessing it never wanes. I particularly like it when MTV follows a group of guys and a group of girls for the week and chronicles their hook-ups, puking, body shots and other assorted activities.

Toe Factor: 4

What is it about the Chevy Corvette that has attracted more cheese than any other sports car out there? Carlisle, PA is a town in SE Pennsylvania, not far from Harrisburg (which is the state capital only because a long time ago the Redcoats controlled Philadelphia).

Toe Factor: 3 (photo looks like it has been altered to enhance her Camel Toe )
# of Lip Enhancing Surgeries: 5

Kylie Minogue is a superstar in Australia and Europe. But Americans have never seemed to give a damn. Why have we Americans embraced chumps like Men at Work, Russell Crowe (the poetry-reciting brat) and Paul Hogan while remaining indifferent to this little strumpet?

Toe Factor: 8

It’s spring break time again. Unfortunately, Tammi here won’t be participating. You see, students of junior colleges like Santa Rosa JC and College of Marin (aka First Unified College of Kentfield) don’t get “Spring Breaks”. Instead, they go “tubin’ on the Russian”. Tammi, eager for her associate degree in Dental Science next year is taking advantage of the speed of the new online registration to go play in the river for a day.

Toe Factor: 8
Nepotoeism Factor: 10

Since Beverly Hills 90210 went off the air last year, business at the PEACH PIT has slumped. With Brandon (Jason Priestly) either in rehab at Promises in Malibu (where his roommate is A.J. from Backstreet Boys) or touring with Barenaked Ladies, Nat needed someone at the counter who could drive traffic and move some of his pies. Enter Tori Spelling, who was ’referred’ to Nat by her dad, the actual owner of the restaurant.

Toe Factor: High (proceed with caution)

Here at The Camel Toe Report we try to come up with inane little quips about funny pictures. We try to make some social commentary along the way as well, when our little minds are functioning at their best.

Toe Factor: 8 (with a 2 handicap for the far right one)
Seen: Pebble, Nantucket Golf, Winged Foot, Pinehurst

We were told that this Camel toe photo was taken at a charity golf tournament. Where does one find courses with trashy women such as these? Portland, Oregon?

Toe Factor: 8
Babe Factor:7

Wow. This is a surprise. In over the years we’ve gone from the Taliban to the Toe-liban. This woman is not really that hot, but given the geopolitical backdrop she is impressive.

Toe Factor: 10
Babe Factor: 10 again
Seen: On a boat saving the seals

I’m glad that NAFTA included Canada… that way this beauty can enter the country without paying a Toeriff. It’s about time Canada started stepping up their game… they’ll have to produce a lot more of these to make up for sending us Tom Green,