Toe Factor: 5
Seen: unfortunately

Here, aging punk icon Iggy Pop performs at the Garage festival in NY. Come on, dude. Put on a shirt. The cottage cheese shoulder. The wrinkled gut. The tight jeans. That ain’t right. When you turn 50, you relinquish the right to remove your shirt in public.

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FabiToe
Toe Factor: 5 (You weren’t expecting much were you?)
Favorite Pastime: Shaving chest. Plucking eyebrows.

Fabio had his 15 minutes. They expired many years ago. Aside from appearing in “Dude, Where’s My Car” and appearing on over 250 romance novel covers, Fabio has done almost nothing noteworthy. Yet, almost everyone knows who he is. You have to give the guy credit.

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Toe Factor:9 (Her tampons are trained in spelunking)
Favorite Movie: “Ya Ya…” all Southern women love Ya Ya

We have here a good example of the new generation of female country singers. When we were growing up, there wasn’t a single hot woman in country music. They all looked like truck drivers. Bad hair. Wide body. Terrible fashion.

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Toe Factor: 8
Babe Factor: 3
Seen: Food courts, arcades, Franz’s house
Favorite: Bon Jovi, Baraka

This little hussie is more woman than her 18 years would indicate. Do not be fooled by the 1989 acid-washed jeans. She only wears them because they have shrunken into a fine display case for her toe. This photo was taken just after she got off work at Chuck E. Cheese

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