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Cameltoe Olympics
Clean and Don
Toe Factor: 5
Overheard Asking: "Can I Supersize the Grand Slam?"
Seen: Using the bars in the handicap stall for support while taking a dump
I am sure this is a nice lady and all. But c'mon. There is no reason for this to occur. Move on. Nothing to see here.
State of Olympic Swimwear Toe
Toe Factor: 7
Here we see swimming champion Lenny Krayzelburg in a Speedo Fastskin FSl1. We'll be seeing a lot of these suits this Summer in Athens, on both men and women. I am not sure that this is what Lenny's parents left the Ukraine for him to become, but here he is, in his late twenties, struggling with a bum shoulder and prancing around like aquaman without a cape. Lenny's bio is compelling, and he's had a great career, but he just seems to have some sort of charisma deficit (combined with being in a sport not hugely popular in the US) which has resulted in a lack of endorsements and crossover appeal. And this year his teammate will probably beat him at the Olympics and Michael Phelps will try to become Mark Spitz sans the pornstar moustache... so chances are that by September Lenny's resume will be on Monster.com and his stellar swimming career will be at the bottom under OTHER ACTIVITIES. He'll be in a cubicle while Ian Thorpe will be in his $4mm penthouse in Sydney getting a massage and sending a text message to that evening's groupie. Justice is elusive.
Olympics
Toe Factor: 8
Seen: With finger down throat to vomit that rice cake
Favorite Movie: Lolita (the Showtime version)
Without question, the worst sport in the olympics is women's gymnastics. First of all, they are not women. They are little girls. And there is nothing amusing about 14 year old girls ruining their bodies and self esteems just to get on a Wheaties Box every 4 years. Every single gymnastics coach is a child molestor. You can tell because they all have moustaches. But the worst part is that they pit the girls against each other. Have you seen the thinly veiled hostility in the fake hugs they give each other after a routine? Compare that to a true team sport like Basketball, Soccer or Volleyball. Those women actually like each other. Gymnastics sucks. Dont get me started.
Camel Toe Girls
Featured Articles
Llittle hussie
This little hussie is more woman than her 18 years would indicate. Do not be fooled by the 1989 acid-washed jeans.
Soccer Balls
Sometimes you see a toe that is so compelling that you need to go in to examine it further.
Royal Toe
Here we have the granddaughter of the Queen of England, Zara Phillips, displaying the kind of Toe we colonists can only dream of. While we here in America find the idea of a monarchy a bit antiquated and silly, it does provide the UK citizenry with ample comedic bandwidth, much like the Kennedys do for us. Zara has a somewhat swollen left lobe providing us some insight into her political leanings.