 |
Cameltoe Women Cameltoe Bikini's
 |
|
Havasu Toe
Toe Factor: 4 (very good thigh separation however)
Dream Job: Assistant Mgr: Sunglass Hut (free Oakleys)
Every year, when the weather gets warm, white people in land-locked portions of the country pack up the Dodge Durango and head to the nearest lake, towing the boat that they bought with Junior's college fund (he ain't smart anyhow). Then, they tie all the boats together and form a flotilla of decadence replete with tattooed women, Keystone Light and camcorders. Eventually, the beer and the smell of oil convinces the women to act out their stripper fantasies on the deck of the Whaler. Our friend here with the Barry Bonds earing hanging from her navel is 2 Merit Menthols away from showing us the goods. By Wednesday, the video will have made its way onto Morpheus, where she will become whacking material for guys from Tustin to Destin. The whole thing is kind of like Burning Man without the creativity. But there is something about this woman that is enticing. Is it the camo bikini? Is it the Gary Busey teeth? Is it the "I might need to take a crap" posture? No. It is the almighty Toe. It's always the Toe.
Spring Break Toe
Toe Factor: 10
Beers/day: 10
liance of creating "Girls gone Wild":Bril 10
Brilliance of getting Snoop Dogg to host "GGW": 10
Spring Break is something that I will never get too old to enjoy watching on MTV. I fully expect to be watching it in diapers in an assisted living facility in 2044. I don't even think that in college I'd have actually wanted to go to South Padre Island or Daytona Beach, but my vicarious pleasure in witnessing it never wanes. I particularly like it when MTV follows a group of guys and a group of girls for the week and chronicles their hook-ups, puking, body shots and other assorted activities. Perhaps I like to picture the cubicle that these young scholars (usually from such academic stalwarts as Plymouth State or Northern Arizona University) will find themselves working from in less than six months? Perhaps it's just garden variety horniness and liking wet T-shirts and 20 year old boobs? Perhaps I enjoy how every year is the same and the experience isn't actually real at all since all participants are playing the role of "spring break-er". MTV never seems to find anyone to profile who appears destined for an interesting future, so perhaps I enjoy watching their grand finale of youth... who knows? No sense thinking too hard about why it's great, it just is. And this is a beautiful cameltoe, and who cares if she'll be a receptionist at the office of her childhood dentist in Ohio in less than 90 days
Carlisle Corvette Toe
Toe Factor: 4
What is it about the Chevy Corvette that has attracted more cheese than any other sports car out there? Carlisle, PA is a town in SE Pennsylvania, not far from Harrisburg (which is the state capital only because a long time ago the Redcoats controlled Philadelphia). In Carlisle it is possible to go to every fast food restaurant that exists in a space smaller than a football field...it's truly caloric armageddon. From what i can tell the entire town is one large food court; when residents of Carlisle wake up to go to the bathroom at night as they walk down their hallways they might pass a Chick-fil-A or a Taco Bell. Carlisle is home to both the Army War College and Washington Redskins (who use Dickinson College for their pre-season training camp), and it is the homegrown truckstop cuisine (gravy makes anything taste better...) that gave the world "the Hogs" of the 1980s and early 1990s. If these girls don't get in a Corvette and get out of town quickly they will end up looking like Joe Jacoby (the ugliest of the Hogs) in a bikini. As an aside, I went to college with a guy from Carlisle who had more body hair than Chewbacca...
Fern Bikini Toe
Toe Factor: High (proceed with caution)
Here at Cameltoe.org we try to come up with inane little quips about funny pictures. We try to make some social commentary along the way as well, when our little minds are functioning at their best. Sometimes, however, there's really not much to ridicule in a photo. Sometimes, the perfection of a photo is such that in ridiculing it you ridicule yourself. This is such a case. OK, it's staged which is against our cardinal rule, but this gal is heat. GW is considering flying this hottie over to Tikrit to use as evidence of WMD. If you can find something wrong with this photo, email your thoughts to us. If you can mock this then you're either more pathetic and cynical than our friend the Finner, or the quality of your life is truly among the best on earth.
Camel Toe Girls
Featured Articles
8th wonder...the TOErracotta Warriors
Dedication . He bought the shirt and had it rushed to him just so he could wear it in China.
Naked News
News, featuring these two pillars of journalism. OK. We know there is no Toe in this photo. But we provide a service to our readers, and we are guessing you care. This is obviously a brilliant idea.
Congressional Toe
First of all, I love that congress is a bicameral legislature. This woman earned a toe factor of 14 because she has two toes... the normal toe as well as a horizontal toe (which is actually more prominent than her regular toe).